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Milkgate Update

Unlike milk, this story doesn't seem to have an expiration date. The bovine juice chugging young man has been offered a new job.

As reported in The Mercury News

MILWAUKEE - (KRT) - A minor-league baseball team is hopping on the milk wagon.

The Fort Myers Miracle of the Single A Florida State League is trying to locate the unidentified batboy who was suspended by the Marlins and put him back to work.

``Similar to a rehab stint, we want to help this kid stay on top of his game,'' Miracle general manager Steve Gliner said. ``Instead of crying over spilled milk, we decided to offer him the honorary post.''


The Miracle, an affiliate of the Minnesota Twins, wants to have him pick up their bats during Monday's game against the Tampa Yankees in Fort Myers.

As part of the promotion, all children 14 and under will receive a pint of milk when entering the stadium, a cow will be stationed at the front gates, and empty milk cartons will be placed throughout the stadium so fans can make monetary donations to the batboy.

The Miracle is owned by a group that includes Mike Veeck, actor Bill Murray and musician Jimmy Buffett. reported that the Milk Processor Education Program offered the batboy $500 and any lost wages from the suspension if he promises to drink the recommended three glasses of milk a day.

In addition, Penny, who was angered by the suspension, told The Miami Herald on Thursday that he intends to compensate the batboy.

A Veeck is joining in on this circus, who would've thunk it.

If I may offer the young man some advice, Take the Money! The fans are being generous accept their money graciously. The others, one was an unintended catalyst of the problem and the rest are looking for a promotion and either way they all have millions -- Take the Money!  Milk this for all it's worth.

Did they ever replace Mr. Rogers? 'Cause I'm available.