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One Night In Tinseltown

2009.05.16 MIAMI, FL — Tinseltown came to Miami tonight. The Marlins defeated the Dodgers 6 to 3 and that's a Good Thing as it ended their 5-game losing streak.

I attended this game at the last minute and I must advise you against going to games with poorly thought-out promotional giveaways. The geniuses in the Marlins' promotions office thought it would be a good idea to hand out poorly made tinsel pom-poms to fans coming to the game.

Except that these pom-poms were so cheap that they disintegrated faster than a 5-run lead handed over to Kevin Gregg. I noted the problem in the 3rd inning when I had to dislodge a couple strands of tinsel from the sole of my shoe. Then i noticed tinsel all over the floor where I was sitting.

As I looked around nearby sections I noticed tinsel in fans' hair, on their shoulders, and draped over the seat backs.

By the 6th inning it was raining tinsel. Fans in the upper deck would take turns showering tinsel down on those below as if doing their duty forming The Wave as it passed their section. Fans in the left field corner were shoveling huge clumps of tinsel onto the playing field between the 6th and 7th innings as 3 members of the grounds crew tried desperately to pick it up; they were hopelessly ovewhelmed.

Mind you, there was a stiff breeze blowing in from the east, roughly from the right field corner toward the left field corner, up in the open air. But down on the field the superstructure of the stadium caused it to swirl back around and blow from behind 3rd base onto the field. This led to a nearly continuous shower of tinsel onto left field, the left side of the infield, and onto the net behind home plate. At a couple points during the game play was held up while large clumps of tinsel wafted  between the pitcher and batter. Thank sweet baby geezus that this game was not televised.

Note to David Sampson: don't give out tinsel pom-poms again. K?

As for the Marlins and the action on the field, it was something of a see-saw game early, with the Fish overcoming a 2-1 deficit for good on a most gracious bases-loaded walk from Eric Milton ("this being Milt") to none other than Dan Uggla, who also got a decent hit later in the game.. Amezaga hit the ball with authority, but right to the left fielder. Of course, Johnny Bakes hit the ball hard and the one time it wasn't caught was because a fan in the Fish Tank caught it for a 2 run home run. That guy just seems to get the timely hits.

Juan Pierre tormented his old teammates by stealing bases like a pro, aided by some crappy throws from that same John Baker. He giveth and he taketh away.

Along about the 8th inning one of the many popcorn showers brewing over the Atlantic passed overhead, sending a surprising number of Dodgers fans for the exits. This gave me the perfect seat vacated behind home plate, although in the meantime the crowds clambering up the steps to leave blocked my view of Amezaga's FC non-hit that made it 6-3 with runners advancing ahead of him. F@cking tourists! Can't take a little heavy mist? This is south Florida fer chrissakes!

Oh, and Matt Lindstrom really can pitch! No, he really can!

The cautionary note on Amezaga is that he tweaked his knee rounding 3rd base, but nobody in-the-know thinks it serious. Pencil him in as day-to-day.

So the Marlins win, snap a losing streak, and even celebrate with BANG! ZOOM! fireworks and a concert by Stevie B. afterwards. It was a mess, but it was our mess and it was enjoyable to witness.

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